i started my preparation for mssd since last week. but some kind of fright is developing in me. the fear of failure. the fear of disappointing my beloved ones and even more. just two weeks away from competition, but i still feel like myself is not capable of, this absolutely cripples me with fear again. i m planning to give up but i wish to achieve something in my life which can fill the emotional gap in me. everyday comes home with an exhausting body even so i still find ways to work on my fitness in order to challenge my fatigue. wtf. wtf.

in fact, he is really hard to wipe off from my mind. he spurs me on to work hard to make my dream materializes. he surged within me to move forward. even though and hitherto, i m still like in the total darkness because i dun see the light showering from him, vulnerable in such strenuous condition. wtf.

my life nothing less than my bunch of good friends. they would soothe my heart and mind, and rid all of my worries. especially 149 and her love ones, their endless love and care often touched me tremendously. they are the ones who always help me face my weakness and at the time pointed out my strengths. their presence always made this comforting feeling come rushing into my mind beautifully and soothingly. she and him always there when i need a shoulder to linger on. without all these buddies around me, my life would be as dreary and dry as the raisins exposed to the desert sun and i would remain alone groping in the dark in my life. hahahahaha needless to utter all the awesome friends who are by my side all the time because you should know where my heart lays. i just love you all to the MAX !!!